I have killed myself a thousand times
and every time I have died in your arms
and every time a tear striking my cheek
awakes me in a place where you are not.
I have walked a thousand corridors opening doors into rooms
finding doors into empty rooms
all empty without you.
I have heard a thousand chimes
and have answered every call
and in all only to find
the faint resonance of you,
I have gazed toward a thousand stars
in vain to fill a sleepless void
in wonder could I find you there
clothed in light silvery blue.
I have cried out a thousand nights
cried out your name like a child
denying the rational consolation
when the hurt is all I have left of you.